Last night Paul and I went to dinner with our daughters. We were seated at a table for four near a large group of local folks. The four of us were conversing very happily amongst ourselves, discussing the week, the menu, the weekend. It was a nice break from the daily quickie dinners we've been having at home. (Mac had a prior engagement and couldn't join us.)
At any rate, the local group seemed to also be enjoying their time out. It appeared to be a family group of at least two generations (young children), if not actually three generations. Other than the general buzz of conversation, I really didn't pay that much attention to them.
That is until I overheard one of the men say something about Mexicans. I admit... I'm sensitive to this subject matter and I listened in. I really didn't have to try too hard because he was exceptionally loud about this subject. Well.. turns out he was telling a joke. His group started laughing, until one of the women noticed my face (I'm sure I must have looked flabbergasted), and suddenly there were a few furtive looks thrown our way and a general silence at their table.
I said nothing, I looked straight at them, and said nothing. In my head I was honestly hoping that my kids didn't hear that joke at all. It took me a moment to join back into the conversation going on at our table. Things seemed to be getting back on track until their food arrived. They all bowed their heads and prayed en masse!... Now.. please don't get me wrong... I have no problem with prayer.. goodness knows it's definitely part of my daily life. But I think I felt even MORE offended seeing them pray when it seemed that they didn't really live the Christian love of all men by the jokes they were eager to laugh at.
I may be too sensitive, I admit. But as we were leaving the restaurant, Kendra brought up the group and the joke. She was also very hurt and offended. And that's what really pisses me off... my children should not have to hear such things in public. Why can't racist people tell their stupid jokes at home instead of out in the world where they can be overheard? And worse yet, do they not even think about what they teach their children when they say such hateful things, even as a "joke"?
10 comments:
I don't get it either. What bothers me more is the insensitivity of children being nearby. I recall when the ex and I went out to dinner with our girls when they were very young, we were trying to enjoy our dinner and this woman was seated at a table in close proximity. She was using such foul language it would make a sailor blush. I put down my fork and could not eat anymore. Finally, my husband called the waiter and said we were leaving. As we were leaving my ex stopped and said something to her about it. Her jaw dropped to the floor and she looked at the two men she was with thinking they would support her. Well one spoke and said "he's right". That is all he said, but it spoke volumes to her. She looked down and was embarrassed, as well she have been.
The only thing I can say is hopefully when those folks bowed their heads they were also saying a silent prayer asking for forgiveness for their ignorance. We can only hope. People make mistakes and mess up all kinds of ways, but purposely making fun of others and calling yourself a Christian I have little patience for. Sorry you and your family were exposed to it.
I don't get it either..and one thing i hate more than that is when the joke is preceded by "I'm not prejudice or anything but did you hear the one about..."
grrrrrrrr!
Lyn
http://journals.aol.com/ukgal36/Britsblog/
It's people like this that give Christians a bad name.... even if they WERE asking forgiveness, they should have apologized.
Joann
hi; first time visiting your journal; Linda (The Long Climb Back Up) wrote an entry today and she had gotten a Nice Matters Award; she said rather than pick journals that she wanted to give the award to (she could pick 1-7 journals) she asked people who read her journal to visit 5 new journals on her side bar of journals so I picked you as one to visit.
I'm sorry that this happened to you and your family on what should have been an enjoyable family outting. What saddens me is the people who ruined your evening that they didn't think before they talked and chose to tell such a rude inappropriate joke.
I try to walk the talk, after reading this about your family, I'm going to make a deeper effort to make sure my words don't hurt others like these people hurt yours.
betty
Hypocrits are everywhere. I'd be amused just thinking of the big surprise waiting for those people in the afterlife. Bigots and racists don't get a pass just because they pray!
xx
Russ
It seems like today everyone feels they can say whatever they want and it's supposed to be ok. There seems to be no tolerance for people from other countries. But, what really gets me is that everyone has ancesters from another country and really has no right to make jokes about anyone in public. Unfortunately, their children are learning to do the same thing.
Madison
I am sorry you were offended I hope it didn't ruin your evening out.
hugs
Sherry
I don't get racist people either, Estella.....I never have, and never will. So many people are hypocrites, and as long it's not something that doesn't directly effect them, they can laugh. You know the worst thing? There may have been a couple people there who didn't think it was right, but rather than not partake in it and say no....they laugh right along with the group. Cowards! Well take great comfort in the fact that Karma is a bitch, and when we least expect it.....God will remind us that we shouldn't have said what we did. I'm sorry you were hurt, and I'm sorry your children were hurt......I wish it hadn't have happened.
Pooh Hugs,
Linda
I do believe some people who are not racist think their "jokes" are funny & indeed tell them about their own as well. I know plenty of Italians do that all the time, about themselves more than others. I made a joke about my kitten being Catholic in my journal & I got a couple of emails about that. Uhm.
I am not saying those people were not wrong, but I think I say things other people don't care for often. ~Mary
ps thank you for your thoughts about my Dad. i really appreciate it.
Wellski....it's times like these when the only thing we can do is let it roll off our backs, it's about all we can do. It was crass for the people to tell the joke, but maybe there were ashamed when they realized they had offended those around them. Hopefully, they, too, learned a lesson, and when they prayed, maybe they asked forgiveness as well.
~Meg
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