Umleitung- (ing) in Germany

  I've actually been amazed at how easy it is to assimilate in a new country.  My German is good enough...I can converse with sales people, I can order food from a menu MY WAY and (more importantly) not feel that I am eating "meat surprise."  I can decipher most road maps (and signs) and generally feel pretty comfortable that I am not going to be lost in some alternate universe. 

That is.. until I run into an UMLEITUNG sign.  Now I don't know what the literal translation for this sign is.. but to me it means "all systems stop, you've now entered the alternate universe"... in plain english, it means DETOUR.   Now, frankly a detour in the United States is usually  pretty straight forward (I can remember an exception in New Mexico, where I had to go almost an hour out of my way to continue my journey to Phoenix along the I-10), but hey if nothing else.. everything is in my native language, so "no worries".

In Germany, the UMLEITUNG is a force to be reckoned with.  Actually...  when it's just a simple UMLEITUNG (like having to use a different road to get to Wuerzburg), it's not any bigger a deal than it is in the states.  However, when I know where I want to go,  the U.S. Army in Schweinfurt for example,  but the UMLEITUNG doesn't know where I want to go, I begin to sweat.  This is when full knowledge of the basic principles of geography would come in handy. This is not an area I'm particularly good at... hence the sweat.

Recently I found myself in the city of Schweinfurt, looking for the Army base there. I took an exit off the autobahn and was trying to find the base. I had to get film developed at the two hour photo store and this was the closest one THAT WAS WORKING to where I live (roughly 1.5 hours away) and of course I had to have them THAT day for Mac's Science Project (a whole nother journal entry, LOL). So.. having never been to this particular Caserne (barracks), I trustingly followed signs saying "U.S. FACILITIES".  Things went well until I hit the UMLEITUNG.  A large barrier had been erected to prevent people from turning onto the street that my U. S. FACILITIES arrow was pointing down! ARGH!!.. I spent several minutes trying to figure out a way to get down that street.   Streets in Germany do not necessarily run parralel nor do they necessarily intersect with the same cross street.  I was so frustrated AND LOST that I wanted to cry.  I drove around, looked down various streets.  Finally I thought "maybe if I get back on the autobahn and take a different exit...." Schweinfurt had three exits off the autobahn.

So.. I got back up on the autobahn... The first time through I took the last exit because there were no specific exits marked with the Army post information on the autobahn.  Once I had gotten off, suddenly direction signs had appeared, which was great, until I hit the umleitung.  Okay.. .so back up to the autobahn and I went back to the first exit into Schweinfurt. Again, almost as soon as I got off there were signs to the Army base.  No Detours to force me off the path this time... and in just a few minutes I arrived at the main gate.  I found the shop, parked and dashed in, because at this point it was late enough in the day I was concerned they wouldn't be able to get them done before they closed.

My description of how my day went tickled my kids so much that we now have a new phrase in our house: "Umleitung-ing".